1. You show up at Jean’s house on Wednesday morning. It looks like nobody’s there. You:
a. Wait quietly outside, hiding in the shadows, hoping somebody else shows up.
b. Pull out your cell phone and make a call to see what’s up.
c. Walk right in. You probably just arrived first.
d. Figure it’s a good time to run a quick errand down the street to Roth’s Grocery and check back in a few minutes.
e. Go home. You’re so confused.
2. Your Bible study leader suddenly asks you to read some verses from the book of Nahum. You:
a. Figure that Nahum must be a latter Old Testament book; he sounds like an older prophet guy. You quickly scan the pages.
b. Look it up in the index. No use pretending here.
c. Ask group members for help.
d. You know exactly where Nahum is! All those gold stars in 5th grade Sunday School weren’t for nothing!
e. You wonder—is Nahum really even a book?
3. While preparing your lesson, you’re asked to look up a word in the dictionary. You:
a. Follow orders and go fetch a dictionary from the study.
b. Yell out the word to your husband down the hall and see if he can come up with something good.
c. Locating a dictionary’s a pain. You leave the question blank, confident that somebody else will look it up.
d. Try to think of what the word means and write down a dictionary-sounding answer of your own, like in Balderdash.
4. Where do you sit during church services?
a. I like it up front, close enough to make eye contact with the pastor and potentially see the spit fly.
b. I sit somewhere in the middle. I’m truly a part of the body.
c. I like to sit in the back where I can survey and support the assembly whole. Plus I can sneak in late if necessary.
d. I sit on the sides. I like to live on the edge.
e. I head for the balcony. I feel closer to God up there.
f. I’m perpetually late and sit wherever the usher directs me, praying it’s not the only seat left—in the very front row.
g. I move around and visit all different parts of the flock; I’m mission-minded like that.
5. What do you listen to on your way to Bible study?
a. Something on the radio.
b. One of my favorite CDs
c. Talking--I have a companion on my journey to Bible study.
d. Nothing. I like to get in the zone before Bible study and clear my mind for spiritual stuff.
6. What do you usually drink at Bible study?
a. Regular coffee
b. Decaf coffee
c. Tea
d. Water
e. Nothing
f. Nobody knows it, but I sneak into Jean’s fridge to see if she’s got anything better.
7. You’ve had an unusually difficult week and haven’t had time to do your Bible study. You:
a. Show up anyway, come clean, hold up your blank pages, and say you’re happy to be there.
b. Answer as many questions as possible at the traffic lights on the way over.
c. Fake it until you’re exposed, smile and declare it’s good to be in fellowship.
d. Decide that you’re so stressed out that perhaps you should take a week off and get some much-needed rest at home.
8. Jean has left out a plate of chocolate chip cookies that are calling your name. You:
a. Grab one and enjoy it with your coffee.
b. Abstain. You ate a healthy breakfast and somehow cookies in the morning really don’t seem all that sanctified.
c. Take a cookie, but only after your growling stomach gives away the fact that you skipped breakfast this morning.
d. Wrap up a cookie for your husband at home.
e. Take a cookie for your husband but end up eating it in the car on the way home.
f. Grab and enjoy a small stack of cookies. We don’t judge each other in our group.
9. At church, what type of music appeals to you most?
a. I like the traditional hymns. Rock of Ages, baby.
b. I like contemporary. Bring on the guitars and drums!
c. I like some traditional and some contemporary songs.
d. I like it when they reinterpret hymns for the modern ear.
e. I’m at a complete loss. Do we even have a choir anymore?
10. October 9, 1996 was the very first day of this Bible study at Jean’s house. What climactic event occurred just one day before?
a. Jean’s house flooded when a member of her family forgot to turn off the bathtub water during an episode of “My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiancé.”
b. Jean broke her foot on some stairs at the beach while carrying a vacuum cleaner.
c. A Curly’s Dairy truck smashed into Jean’s house.
d. Jean’s boys unloaded the dishwasher without being asked.
(Answer: The first three actually occurred at some point, temporarily curtailing Jean’s ability to host. But the event that occurred the day before the first Bible study was Curly’s.)
BONUS QUESTIONS, worth three points each:
A. Name the three ladies who led our group before we moved to rotating leadership. (Sandy, Sonya, Deb)
B. Who was our first “coach”? (Sue)